Monthly Archives: November 2010

Day 6. FLASHBACKS

Living with trauma means being a tight-rope walker. To not be put off-balance by the post-traumatic selves that you must juggle while you walk, to manage to move forwards while the competing demands of everyday life and a traumatic past … Continue reading

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Day 5. DISCLOSURE

To speak is to ask to be heard. When what you have to say will be damaging, to both yourself and to those you ask to listen, how do you decide to speak? When what you have to say will … Continue reading

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Day 4. EXHAUSTION

At first I slept. At least twice a day. I was always in bed by eight o’clock and got out of bed as late as I could. The aim was to go to bed before it got dark and get … Continue reading

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Day 3. TERROR

Security is an illusion. One you take entirely for granted until you can believe in it no longer, until you find it has been plucked from your possession viciously and malevolently, leaving you only with a gaping emptiness, a horrendous, … Continue reading

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Day 2. SHAME

The first feeling to emerge from the fog of shock is shame. And when it comes, it hits hard. Suddenly, the disorientation, the dullness and the emptiness give way to a searing, inescapable assessment of culpability along with an unbearable … Continue reading

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Day 1: SHOCK

I didn’t know this could happen. Reading that, (and this is exactly how it felt, writing it down), you’ll be thinking – is she stupid? What do you mean you didn’t know rape could happen? Of course, I knew of … Continue reading

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What’s this all about?

As a victim of sexual assault I have had my life turned upside down, my beliefs and hopes decimated and my sense of self devastated. In trying to make sense of what happened to me, I have struggled overwhelmingly with a … Continue reading

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